Billy Joel says it best. “Honesty is such a lonely word, everyone is so untrue. Honesty is hardly ever heard and mostly what I need from you.”
So often we present a Facebook status view of ourselves to the world; even those closest to us. That’s one of the reasons I believe Facebook is so popular. It allows us to hide or display ourselves as much or as little as we want to. Now, of course, there are extremes of each.
We’ve all seen, and desperately tried to forget, updates on a person’s bowel movements – with or without accompanying graphic; the selfie in the toilet; the badly framed view which didn’t take the mirror behind them into account; the 2am night out shot – etcetera, etcetera, ad nauseum.
And the moment by moment, blow by blow account.
Mostly though, I think we as a society are guilty of the director’s cut life. You know what I mean. Those Facebook updates that make you feel like your life is never going to measure up. By comparison, you – or your significant other – don’t make the grade. Photos of huge flower bouquets from darling husbands for no reason. Happy, smiling families with not a hair out of place. Cute videos of children who walked sooner, further and on a cleaner floor no less, than yours. New jobs, new friends, new hair, whatever it is, it’s always good and it’s always better than yours.
Now please don’t get me wrong, I’ve probably posted about every single one of the things listed above, with the glaring exception of the cleaner floor. It’s what Facebook is for, no doubt, but is it honest? And if we live that way in the virtual world, how much creeps in to our real, face to face, everyday interactions?
Virtual world or not, it’s ridiculously easy to pop on our ‘game face’ and answer, “Fine,” at appropriate moments, but if we do it too often, I believe we actively block real connection with those to whom we could be close.
For real connection, be honest. Be real. Don’t be, “Fine.” Be, “Just awful, but thanks for asking.” Be, “I’ve had better mornings, thanks.” Cry if necessary.
Be you, in all your glorious splendour.
Be you, good, bad or ugly.
Be you. Truthful. Honest